What are the Odds?!

So right now, as of today, the Powerball lottery is up to $400 million dollars.  Is this a big deal to me? No, because I don’t waste my money on pointless hopes. There are terrible odds. It’s insane.

In fact, Time wrote an article about it. They included Ten Things that are more likely to occur than winning the Powerball…

Here are 10 things that are more likely to occur than winning the lottery:

1. Dying from an asteroid strike: 1 in 74,817,414.  Personally, I’m pretty happy that the odds are this bad. I wouldn’t like to see a life-ending event in my lifetime.

2. Getting killed by a terrorist act in the United States: 1 in 10,000,000. I’m old enough to remember 9/11 and the Boston Marathon bombing. I’d rather not face either of these personally, although I know people who have.

3. Getting murdered during a trip to the Grand Canyon: 1 in 8,156,000. OK, well since I’m not planning to visit Arizona any time soon, I’m safe here.

4. Dying from chronic constipation: 1 in 2,215,900. Why wouldn’t you just take something? What causes it to be chronic?  And this coming from someone who suffers from IBS…

5. Becoming a movie star: 1 in 1,505,000. I’m ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille.

6. Getting struck by lightning: 1 in 1,101,000. I actually know someone this has happened to.  I tease him about it all the time.

7. Dying from a hornet, wasp or bee sting: 1 in 79,842. Unless I am stung multiple times like Macaulay Culkin’s  character in My Girl, I doubt that I’m in much danger here.

8. Bowling a 300 game: 1 in 11,500. Oh. Yes. This is the one. I used to bowl in a league when I was a child. My highest game?  247. Bowling a 300 game could happen.

9. Being the same height actor Hugh Jackman, who is 6-foot-2: 1 in 23.3. I’m 36, and 5’8.5″ tall. I would reckon that I’m finished growing.

10. Becoming disabled, disfigured or killed by a parasite: 1 in 7.2. Sure. What a way to go.  You can’t even face it because it’s so small. Bastards.

So what’s the point of all of this?  Save your money for something more worthwhile…like being able to afford that Lamborghini you’ve always wanted. Chances are, you’ll be able to afford one before you win the Powerball.

.JJJ 2016




3 thoughts on “What are the Odds?!

  1. Great post! Ours in Virginia will be about 640 million by Saturday… will I buy a ticket? nope! I don’t like those odds either and I would much rather toss that money in my “trip to Maine” can and save it. Cheers!

    1. Lori, I’m in VA too. Even now, when it’s over $1 billion I won’t be buying tickets. I would rather spend my money on something guaranteed, like dinner or a movie. Thanks for the comment!

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